Thursday, April 26, 2007

Book 12 Chapter 19 叫び Trans-summary

From chinese translations done by Hinako.

Draft: Version 1 - final
Notes: translation-cum-summary notes; 和服 wafuku (Japanese clothing - kimono); 僧兵 souhei (warrior monk); 僧形 sougyou (the form of a Buddhist priest / priestly attire)
PS: do not distribute this without my permission



An outcry, like a mangled echo, resonating through the blaze and blood-tinted world.

At that moment, Takaya abandoned everything. Calling his name, Takaya hurried to Naoe's side and clasped his body.

"Naoe! Naoe!"

As soon as he held his body, blood began to emanate from his left chest, trickling onto the ground, as he heard the final cardiac beats. It was a clean shot through the heart. A large pool of blood had accumulated on the ground. Takaya shook Naoe's slightly convulsive body intensely, madly shouting unceasingly without regard for his own life.

"Naoe! Naoe! Naoe--!"

There was no answer.

His lips were quivering in shock. Naoe's limp body rested against his arm, his slightly-opened eyes looking out.

In that fleeting moment.
Their eyes met.
His lips trembled a little.
But that was the end.
Naoe's head rested on his arm, without any strength.
Then, a static silence.

All the muscles in his body relaxed, his strength faded.

"..."

Takaya's eyes widened. All thoughts came to halt. He only stared at Naoe who was dying. Closing his eyes, his face buried in Takaya's chest, Naoe drew his last breath. Terumoto, who had opened fire, was already dead from the violent recoil of the pistol.

But Takaya did not look at him. His arms felt heavy, holding on to the motionless body. Takaya's white wafuku was stained with Naoe's blood, gradually turning to a scarlet red.

Takaya remained stationary. He did not blink, his eyes transfixed on Naoe lying in his arms. His dry lips soundlessly called his name.

Naoe...

For 400 hundred years, he had called no one else's name as many times, and now he once again murmured repeatedly.

Takaya could no longer say anymore.
...Naoe... ...has been shot.
Shot... And then...

***

"Saburou-dono!"

A figure appeared from the flames, Kotarou had finally come. Upon seeing the form of Rairyu, Kotaro was alarmed and immediately raised his guard.
"Rairyu!"

"!"

Rairyu, who had been paying attention to Takaya, turned his head and swelled in power. Kotarou instantly prepared himself for an attack.

"Saburou-dono! Saburou...!"

Midway, Kotarou could not help but stop calling.

Takaya enfolded Naoe's body in a tight embrace. Holding him closely, holding him with every inch of his strength, desperately seeking for any sign of life from the body.

However, any small flicker of life no longer existed.

"Naoe--...!"

The words of sorrow that left Takaya's mouth stole away what fighting spirit there was between Rairyu and Kotarou. Takaya listlessly held on to Naoe's body that still had some semblance of warmth. Blood was still flowing out of the aperture in his left chest. Hearing the flow of liquid with the rusty smell of blood, Takaya mumbled once again.

"...Naoe..."
Takaya could not accept the fact of what had happened before his very eyes.

Only just a while ago was he relating his heart's intentions but now his lips could no longer move. Not even the smallest breath could be issued. Hoping that he would answer, Takaya gripped his languid fingers, but his body no longer exuded any hint of strength. Some warmth lingered in his body. But...

"..."

Takaya did not move. He remained motionless, as if staring into a void. So much that it made one wonder if his frozen predicament meant that he had forfeited his life, Takaya's entire body was locked in a rigid state.

Kotarou wanted to approach him. But in that moment, he heard Takaya murmur.

"...what... is this..."

Takaya's eyes were fully open and he mumbled in a hoarse voice.
"This... What is this..."

The heavy body that rested on his arm, the blood that stained his fingers bright-red, the sunken cheeks, the mouth slightly ajar, the unmoving eyelids, the hair...
"A nightmare--..."

Mumbling in a low voice, Takaya gazed at Naoe's face.
"Can I... wake up already?"
He uttered at the lips that no longer answered, the eyes that were no longer focused.

"I want to wake up from this sort of nightmare. Everything will be fine once I'm awake, right?

No matter how sincere or hopeful his query, there was no answer from the body.
"Naoe."

Takaya's expression crumbled into sadness as he cried out imploringly.
"Naoe--......"

Kotarou placidly regarded the two of them. Takaya held Naoe's head in a close embrace, gently rubbing his own cheeks against Naoe's warm face.
"Answer me, Naoe..."

By his ears, he begged with heartfelt intentions.
"I don't want to continue having this sort of nightmare. I want to wake up immediately. Naoe, come and save me. Take me with you... I want to wake up straightaway, quickly return to the reality of this world..."

The dry eyes did not blink.
"Return to the reality of this world..."

The last piece of warmth had left the body.
"Return..."

These closed eyes will never open again. The depth reflected in these eyes will never...
"A world... with you..."

Takaya's eyes gradually became moist. The spiritual vigor that had supported Takaya's life all this while could be heard collapsing. There was no reason or logic to be had, his entire spiritual constitution deteriorated into a cry of grief.
"Ah.....Ah.....!"

A mass of intense electrical energy erupted from Takaya's body. The high-voltage current extended in all four directions, tearing through in a chaotic manner.

"!"

The severe, haphazard discharge of power forced both Rairyu and Kotarou to shield their own bodies. Gusts of wind began to encircle the area, sweeping up the flames. A tremendous amount of energy progressively expanded from Takaya's body. It far exceeded the strength of a human - surpassing the limits of control, dangerous, ...powerful, a formidable force that could destroy everything.
"AHHH...AHHHH..."

Takaya could no longer control the fierce outburst of emotions.
"AHHHH!!!!"

Crying out with all of his feelings surging from within the depths of his soul, Takaya's body was falling into ruin with the explosive emission of energy.

(He's insane...!)
Kotarou, sensing the unprecedented danger at hand, could not help but shout out.
"Saburou-dono!"

That startling cry, as if wanting to set the heavens on fire, shook the skies in its resonance.
The devastation of the world.
Takaya's staggering grief brought forth an alarming amount of destruction to the area.

***



• Kikkawa Motoharu on Chrysanthemum beach, hears explosion from the square of Hagi City, reacts in shock
• Senses the deeply mournful atmosphere, before an earthquake rocks the district, the impact is thunderous (akin to mountains uprooting)
• The intensely violent, fiery wind nearly suffocates Motoharu as he makes his way through the blazing storm raging across the rubble and debris, shielding himself from the whirlwind of flames
• Basically a blazing inferno on earth (Motoharu: What the hell is this?!)
• Sees damage done to the city centre, hears and feels Takaya's 'cry', the misery of it tearing through his soul, a cry that drives anyone who hears it, mad
• Motoharu wonders whose cry it is, knows that if he continues to linger in the area his soul would be destroyed by this sorrowful energy
• Kuchiba tells Motoharu-sama it's too dangerous, requests for him to seek refuge in the 'Yamato'
• Motoharu is looking for Terumoto, Kuchiba stops him from going into the city
• City is in a terrifying, fiery ruin, Motoharu remembers Naoe's words about Kagetora's uncontrollable power as he realizes who is responsible, calls Kagetora a monster



There was no one left to stop him.
The only person who could contain Kagetora's uncontrollable power no longer existed.
Everything had been burnt right to the core in a fierce black flame. Takaya, kneeling, still held on to the remains of Naoe. One could discern that his eyes no longer reflected anything else but insanity.

Rairyu was no longer there. Did he flee or had he been burnt to ashes? Such that not a sign of him remained.

"Sa...buro....dono--!"

Kotarou managed to support himself with a great deal of difficulty. He stabilized his Goshinha, drawing upon all his power to stop Takaya from going out of control. But all of his efforts to communicate with Takaya were in vain.

If this continues, Hagi will crumble.
And not just crumble, it will be completely annihilated. If Takaya's overwhelming power was not placed in check, not only the city but the entire foundation of the delta would disintegrate.

(Don't do this, Saburou-dono!)
But Takaya was already locked within his madness. The boundless power that had been unleashed, such that the ground all around had long been upturned by the destructive forces, began to induce a turbulent motion from beneath. However, nothing could stop this.

Nothing could suppress his actions.
Everything will perish!
Kotarou shouted with all of his strength.
"Saburou-dono ----!"

--I will always be by your side. Forever.
The voice that cannot be heard.
The feelings that can no longer be felt.
--I won't leave you again. Until the day you be the death of me, I won't be killed by anyone else.
You swore to me.
You promised me.
I believed, that only this oath was the ultimate truth.
Saying that you would never die...
Saying that you would never let death leave me alone, you promised me!
Didn't we make this promise, Naoe!

Death approached, surrounding him, rapidly stealing his warmth. Takaya attempted to resist by transmitting half of his own body heat to him [Naoe], but Death sneered at Takaya's futile struggle and took him [Naoe] away.

(No...!)

The flames of Hell surrounded Takaya himself. Desperately holding onto the cold deceased body, Takaya burst into tears as he cried.
"No...Ahh...!!!"

A fiery wind assailed his hair. His skin was scorched by the flames. However the blood that flowed out was cold, dying his chest black. The words he [Takaya] heard so vividly firmly remained in his ears. It was that clear. His arm's strength that embraced him [Naoe], his fingers pressed into his flesh, so much that his [Takaya] body's heat was branded onto his [Naoe] torso, around his waist... his back, his chest.

--I love you...!
He remembered those words in his ears. That voice. The plain declaration that was nearly akin to throwing up blood. It seemed like Takaya could hear his true confessions of pain and grief. Not very long ago. In fact, he heard it just now!

Takaya cried out, twisting his entire body. Words drowned in a startling cry of grief.

His soul flared up. His mental faculties started to collapse, piece by piece. Takaya was going mad. Losing control over his expanding destructive power, Takaya himself was about to be cauterized.

To continue in this manner, Takaya will die. At this point, if no one intervened, Takaya will die.
"Ahhh!!!"

His brain was boiling. His cells were rupturing. His blood was flowing in the opposite direction, about to burst out from his insides.
"Ahhhhhhhhhh----!!!"

The gaseous sound of a spray could be heard, the intensity of the blaze becoming more ghastly. The district of Hagi city had changed into a frightening mass of flames. The countless sparks of fire that flew out began to burn the streets of the city.

Voices of wailing could be heard as the people scattered away from the area. The streets were being bombarded by a meteoric rain of fire.

Holding on to the bony remains, which was all that was left of Naoe, Takaya raised his head towards the sky. His outpouring emotions had surpassed all limits, his consciousness was rapidly fading. Tangerine rays of light began to dance about his body, resembling fireflies. Those were spiritual fragments being stripped away from Takaya's soul. His shouts had finally been subdued by this storm of madness, Takaya closed his eyes in subsidence. A ferocious flame engulfed Takaya and Naoe, as if to extinguish their bodies.

"Don't, Saburou-dono ---!"
Kotaro shouted out.
"Saburou-dono ---!"

Suddenly, a strong wind blew across his head.

The blazing energy that engulfed Takaya and Naoe was smothered before Kotaro's eyes.
(What...!)

Some sort of huge pressure covered the area above. Like an immense biological power threatening the crazy flames, bringing about a humble calm.

A white light shone all around. The radiance bore a divine elegance that poured into the impure environment. Kotaro contemplated the celestial being in astonishment.

"!"

A great dragon appeared in the sky.

It was not a fire dragon. This dragon that radiated the luminous white light was something far more majestic. A beautiful luster was reflected off its scales; its eyes, profound and impenetrable. The long trunk of its body glided in a wave-like motion, floating in the air as it regarded Takaya.

Kotaro knew. He knew the true appearance of this dragon. He knew the actual identity of this dragon.
"Uji...yasu... kou..."

He was Kagetora's biological father - Hojo Ujiyasu, in the manifestation of a dragon.

His father emerged once again due to his son's extreme delirium and now hovered over him as he was losing consciousness. The dragon gazed at Kotaro, gesturing with its head, flew towards Takaya. The strong winds and the fiery tempest gradually weakened as the radiance diffused in.

Ujiyasu extended his coarse arm, as thick as a tree trunk, towards Takaya. Still holding on to Naoe's skeletal remains, Takaya slowly let go of his [Naoe] body as he collapsed into Ujiyasu's hands.

He was no longer conscious.

Takaya's body, so close to destruction a few moments ago, laid horizontal in the hands of his biological father.
"Ujiyasu-kou..."

Kotaro callously looked up at the dragon, sparkling with a silver radiance. Ujiyasu once again moved his body in one great spiral, carrying away Kagetora in his hand, towards the horizon.

Kotaro ran over to the remains of the body. Just to make sure, Kotaro once again surveyed Naoe's pulse, testing for any hint of breath. But Naoe was completely dead. He was truly dead.

"Naoe--..."

Muttering, Kotaro closed his eyes. He had experienced countless deaths calmly without a tinge of emotion or regret, and now he was silent in prayer? He bitterly wrinkled his brow as he knelt down.

After that, he slowly got up, taking out a bottle of sacred oil and quietly poured out the contents over the remains, in a Buddhist manner. A gust of wind blew across and the fiery conditions began to intensify again. It would be dangerous to linger around. Kotaro picked up a burning piece of wood and threw it onto the body, igniting its remains.

A pale fire arose.

This was a hellish cremation. But if the remains were left as it is, sooner or later, the police would arrive at the scene and start an investigation.

Furthermore, it would be better if Kagetora did not see this. He would not be able to endure this.

Kotaro looked up to the sky. In mid-air, Ujiyasu was directly looking his way.

"Follow me."
Ujiyasu instructed Kotaro, changing his direction as he moved towards the horizon.

The fires were still burning under the night sky of Hagi.

The land had been scarred by the shocking brutality and misery of the madness. A continuous police siren howled all over Hagi city.



• Motoharu watches the city burn from the deck of 'Yamato', thinks of Terumoto, holds head in hands shaking, notes shadow of Mount. Gassan; retainers gather around him
• Motoharu laments fate of Hagi city, voices of despair around him
• (Kuchiba: What do we do now Motoharu-dono?) Heavy sigh, decides to head for Itsukushima; orders crew to direct the 'Yamato' to Innoshima
• Hopes to have a meeting with Takakage & co. at Innoshima, plan in advance to takeover Itsukushima with the support of Wu regiment of fighters
• Plans of conquering Itsukushima boosts morale among the retainers
• They have lost the fort and no other route to take
• Motoharu doesn't really know what they're fighting for without Mouri Terumoto, but stares resolutely at the sea
• Motoharu tells himself that the Mouri will not be destroyed; as long as he's still alive, the Mouri are here to stay and that's what he'll fight to maintain

***

• Hakkai witnessed the fall of Hagi city with his own eyes, in the middle of the night, wondered what happened
• After splitting up with Ayako, he arrived at Hagi city yesterday afternoon, he surveys the unusual changes; notes an area covered by a powerful kekkai
• Inside the kekkai are Mouri's soldiers, being subjected to rigorous interrogation; no one willing to walk on the streets
• Hides any expression of worry so as to not let the enemy take advantage
• Hakkai can't take any action, can only focus on moving around unnoticed
• Can only detect the triangular kekkais of the Toukou-ji and Daisho-in temple groups
• Just when he sensed Kagetora's and Naoe's kekkais, Mount. Kasayama erupts
• (Hakkai: Is everything well with you? Kagetora-sama...)
• After all the dust has settled, continues into city; firemen on the scene
• Sees city in utter ruin (hills collapsed, trees burnt to the ground, not a trace of the old landmarks, looked as if the earth's crust had crashed and lifted upwards, complete change in topography)
• Policemen and firefighters in the area, there's a commotion and no one is allowed in
• Hakkai senses an intense feeling of longing in the area, so strong that it can incur injury if one wasn't careful, knows that it's the someone's thoughts that gave rise to this catastrophe
• Hakkai understands that the person who cried with all of his soul's strength was Kagetora, there was no other person who possessed this level of power
• Hakkai wants to at least ascertain Kagetora's condition; hears some noises inside as if they found a body
• Shouts demanded a stretcher and blanket
• Hakkai sees them bringing out a charred corpse, unable to make out if it's male or female, stares at the body in inspection - looks like a man, a hole in his left chest, like he was shot with a handgun
• He panics because the body's size resembles Takaya, approximates his height, taking into account the reduction from having been burnt, concludes that he's too short to be Takaya
• Hakkai observes the confusion all around, notes that it wouldn't be surprising to find the victims reduced to bones, in fact the fire was so intense some may have been burnt to ashes and merged with the ground, with no remaining traces
• Hakkai aimlessly walks around desperately trying to search for any traces
• Nearly trips over a blackened rib bone, can't find any sign of Kagetora and Naoe and worries that they might really be gone.
• Hakkai calls out but no answer, continues to call as he stumbles about
• Then he sees a white radiance, vaguely at first, the mass of light is stationary at first on the scorched earth then takes a human form, peaking Hakkai's curiosity
• Takes the form of a man on horseback, the dazzling image becomes clearly visible, horseman on white horse, calmly looks his way
• On his head is a white hood, doesn't wear any armor, just a long blade by his waist; bearded; a clear sight; although not very tall or impressive in physical stature, but definitely a warlord who has experienced many battles
• The scar on his face, the intense eyes, this was the appearance of a souhei... a dignified military general
• Hakkai rendered speechless and stares; then the sougyou general looks at him, moving into attack position, stands with his back to the sea, emitting a dazzling light and waits

Original fiction © Kuwabara Mizuna.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Book 12 notes

People
下間賴廉/ 下间赖廉: Shimozura Rairen
赖龙: Rairyu
口羽: Kuchiba
隆景: Takakage
鳴美/鸣美: Narumi
友: Tomo (?)
漁/渔: Isari (?)
楊貴妃: Youkihi (Yang Gui Fei)
熊谷信直: Kumagai Nobunao
鹿之介: Shikanosuke
尼子: Amako

Places
荻: Hagi - a city in Yamaguchi prefecture, it is considered to be one of the most beautiful castle towns in Japan; a lot of traditional old streets and buildings survive untouched
須佐/须佐 Susa - a scenic area in Hagi
新庄 Shinjo
津具半島 Tsugu hantou - Tsugu Peninsula

月山: Mount. Gassan
笠山: Mount. Kasayama - small active volcano (smallest in Asia)
中岳: Mount. Naka-dake - one of the five prominent mounts known as the Aso-gogaku (阿蘇五岳) located around the center of the caldera created by Mount Aso (阿蘇山), the largest volcano in Japan

广岛: Hiroshima
嚴島/严岛: Itsukushima - an island in the Inland Sea of Japan

宮島/宫岛: Miya-jima - (Hiroshima) was a town located on the island of Itsukushima, amagalated with the city of Hatsukaichi on November 3, 2005.

因島: Innoshima - a city located in Hiroshima

秋芳洞: Akiyoshi-do - a huge cave in the southern end of Akiyoshidai (秋吉台)

東光寺: Toukou-ji - Zen temple in Kanagawa
大照院: Daisho-in - temple dedicated to the Mori clan

本願寺/本愿寺: Hongan-ji - temple of Amida Buddha's original vow

Others
大和: Yamato - name of the ship belonging to the Mouri
護身波/护身波: Goshinha - wave of self-protection
結界/结界: kekkai
大正: Taishou
鐘乳洞/ 钟乳洞: shounyuudou - limestone cave

阿弥陀如来: Amida nyorai
淨土: joudo - Pure Land Buddhist sect
眷屬/眷属: kenzoku - Gods or messengers subordinate to an important deity; originally a Buddhist term
同格: doukaku - the same rank / equality / apposition

宝珠: takara shu - gem/jewel
干珠 & 滿珠/满珠: kanju & manju - the magical jewels, that when thrown into the sea, Manju causes a rising tide and Kanju an ebbing tide; these spheres were the treasures of the Undersea Palace
秘宝: hihou - treasure/treasured article

潮滿瓊/潮满琼: shiomitsutama - mythical gem that can bring high tides
潮干瓊/潮干琼: shio-hurutama - mythical gem that can bring ebbing tides

真言: shingon - mantra / quintessential word / Mantrayana / Shingon, Sino-Japanese esoteric Buddhism, originating in the eight century

水軍: suigun (marine guards/naval forces)

天狗: tengu - long-nosed goblin / braggart

陀羅尼: darani - dharani / spell / litany / Sanskrit multi-syllabic chant

念波: nen nami

誓約/誓约: seiyaku - written vow, pledge, covenant

靈獸: reijuu - sacred beast

僧服: soufuku - priestly garb
僧兵: souhei - warrior priest/monk

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Book 08 Chapter 19 最後の真実 partial translation

From chinese translations done by Hinako.

Draft: Version 1 - final
Notes: last 3/4 of the chapter; 大日如来 Dainichi Nyorai (Mahavairocana Tathagata / perfected one - suffix of high-ranking Buddhist deities); 九頭龍/九头龙 Kuzuryuu - the primary deity of Hakone Shrine (箱根神社); 大叔父 dai oji (granduncle); 参道 sandou (road approaching a shrine)
PS: do not distribute this without my permission



Naoe looked at Takaya, whom he cherished dearly. His appearance remained the same. Naoe became anxious, growing stiff and began to call him.

"Takaya-san..."

He tapped Takaya's cheeks.

"Takaya-san...? Takaya-san!"

His cheeks were cold and there was no answer. Naoe desperately shook Takaya's body, patting his cheeks.

"Takaya-san! Please wake up! Takaya-san! Takaya-san!"

The physical body was already dead. In truth it was impossible for the body to recover. Relying on the power of the gods only served to provide a sense of security. It was not possible in the first place. Even if the soul had been successfully released from the Tsutsuga mirror, the probability of him reawakening was close to zero.

Even though Naoe was aware of this, he still called to Takaya. The body seemed dead. Naoe called Takaya's name unceasingly, as if wanting to intensely summon Takaya forth from the netherworld.

Even so, Takaya's eyes were still firmly closed, with no signs of opening. There wasn't even the slightest movement. The colour of his skin was devoid of any signs of blood flow.

Isn't this to be expected? This person wasn't going to come back to life, was he? Wasn't it already too late? There was nothing left to do but give up...

"Open your eyes! Breathe!"

Naoe looked as if he was about to throw up blood from the way he called Takaya with a mad longing.

"Please come back!"

Gripping his wrist with all his strength.

"Takaya-san!"

Takaya's eyebrow quivered slightly. Naoe started, his eyes widened, turning bloodshot.

Slowly opening his mouth, lips trembling, the momentary sound of inhalation could be heard. Then, the intake of oxygen, gasping for air.

"Ta..ka..ya..."

His beloved Takaya was finally breathing. His brow creased as if in pain; the colour returning to his skin, his eyelids quivering lightly as his eyes slowly opened at last.

His clouded vision slowly dissipated into a clear image. He never lost this radiance, his eyes, filled with life, gazing at Naoe's face.

"... . Na..oe..."

"..."

No precious gem could compare with the clear, transparent beauty of these Tiger's Eyes that were currently gazing into his own. These rays of brilliance that penetrated his chest was enough to make a sinner weep.

"..."

Exposing inconceivable emotions, Takaya slowly raised his hand, wanting to wipe away the tears on Naoe's face, extending his fingers. Just at that moment, he was suddenly aware of a strange object in his mouth. Using his tongue to manipulate it out, he held the object in his hand. It was a small prayer bead. Situated within was a radiance emitting from the minute, pearl figurine of Dainichi Nyorai. The protection bestowed by the nyorai must have preserved his body, allowing it to recover from its lifeless state.

"Naoe..."

Although Takaya called him, Naoe did not answer. Tears continued to fall from his eyes, and as such, Takaya could not move from his recumbent position. Regardless of whether Takaya understood the life-or-death choices that Naoe had gone through, or if he merely wore an indifferent appearance, he still had an ignorant expression on his face.

At this moment, Naoe could not call his name.
Holding on to Takaya's moist and slippery body, Naoe tightly embraced him. Even though Takaya's body was ice-cold and wet, Naoe could sense some warmth, able to hear the rhythm of his heartbeat.
Then slowly, Naoe began to let go of Takaya's body, allowing him to lie on the surface. Takaya looked unwaveringly at Naoe who was silently covering his body with his clothes. He spoke softly.

"It is as I believed..."

"..."

"That when I awakened, you would definitely be by my side..."

As if wanting to stop him from saying anything else, the man's moist hand came to rest on Takaya's lips. He pressed his face near Takaya's neck. Wrinkling his brow and shutting his eyes, the man grabbed Takaya's hand and placed it on his face in a caress. His lips touching his throat, the strangled cry of a wild animal escaping his voice.

Naoe, Takaya quietly uttered. Mumbling repeatedly to him.
"... thank you."

The man only wept, wanting to draw all the words he was incompetent of expressing into his breath, pressing his cold lips against the mouth of the other. Receiving this kiss that was wrought of agony, tears began to stream down Takaya's face like melted blood.

The surface of the lake was sorrowfully quiet as a blue mist enveloping the area passed by unnoticed...

* * *

The dense fog that covered Lake Ashi scattered within the hour. Like a mirror, the surface of the lake reflected the clear and boundless, blue sky and the beautiful hills. The sunshine was intense. Their wet bodies would soon be dry.

Takaya had given instructions to guide their small boat from the centre of the lake to the docks near the Kuzuryuu shrine. While operating the boat under Takaya's directives, Naoe realized that all the injuries he had sustained were already healed without him knowing. He should have taken a considerable amount of damage, even believing that he would no longer be able to move from the wounds. He could not fathom how he seemed to be fully recovered now.
(How can this happen...)
Naoe found it strange, with Takaya beside him who was looking ahead in askance, he mentioned all of a sudden.
"I heard that the tears of the dragon that resides in Lake Ashi were regarded as holy water, with the ability to cure disease and grief."

"..."

"The mixture of the dragon's tears with the Lake Ashi, have made these waters sacred. I heard this from Grand Uncle."

Naoe forgot his rhetorics as soon as he looked at Takaya's profile. The eyes of a fierce tiger, still staring ahead.
All of a sudden Takaya seemed to break out of this countenance, turning towards Naoe.
"I just recently..."

"..."

Naoe looked at Takaya with harsh eyes. What exactly did Naoe want from this Takaya who sometimes unconsciously reverted back to his Kagetora self. Takaya had no way of reading all of his thoughts.
Takaya had experienced this extreme calm of Naoe's gaze a few times before, always feeling an uneasiness within his chest.

The two of them did not say another word.

The motorboat was nearing the wooden dock of Hakone.
On the boundary of the Kuzuryuu shrine laid the remains of a man.
It seems as if nobody knew of the incidents that had taken place in this area.
They left the motorboat and headed towards the Kuzuryuu shrine.

Takaya quietly turned over the body of the man whose blood had stained the stone steps.

"..."

Takaya did not show any signs of panic or guilt at sight of the remains of the body. He only had a serious expression very much like the face of a policeman conducting an investigation.
After that, he abruptly headed to the sandou which lead towards the lakeside, coming to the water's edge.

"Did you come to save Kagetora?"

Naoe's eyebrow quivered at the question.
Takaya continued to gaze at the waves on the surface of the lake, repeating his question.
"You came to save Kagetora, right?"

Naoe did not answer. Takaya could not tolerate the uncommunicative silence.
"You came here to save Kagetora, right? Not to save Ougi Takaya, isn't that correct!

Naoe still maintained his composure.
"I came to save you."

"Not me but Kagetora."

"It's you."

"You mean Kagetora!"

Takaya, who was now facing Naoe, was earnest, furthermore he was blatantly expressing his indignation from the very bottom of his heart. Seeing Naoe again, Takaya felt a small sense of relief in his heart, absent since that day in Toyama when he left him - no, this estrangement from Naoe had originated from a much earlier period of time.
"You're not protecting me because of Ougi Takaya. You don't know anything about me..."

"..."

"I don't want that sort of transparent tenderness."

Naoe felt like a chasm of hurt was suddenly lodged in his chest. A resolute man, he pretended to be calm as he listened to Takaya's words. The man closed his eyes and repeated himself to Takaya.
"It's you..."

Takaya shut his eyes and quietly shook his head continuously.
"Not Takaya."

"It's you."

"You're always like that! Don't shove all the pain you bear for Kagetora onto me anymore!"

An austere glint appeared in Naoe's eyes. It was clearly a sign of anger.
"Are you planning to run away from my side again?"

"I'm not the one running away. You only consider me as a substitute, don't you? You're thinking that as long as it's Ougi Takaya, you can impose on him things that Kagetora himself would not accept."

"..."

"You're really despicable! Such a cunning and astute person. You only consider this Ougi Takaya with no past to be a passing convenience. Meeting me and pretending to treat Ougi Takaya with such high importance. The truth is you never once took into consideration any of Ougi Takaya's affairs..."

After shouting, Takaya tried to suppress his frenzied feelings, shutting his eyes for a while. A breeze blew from the surface of the lake, ruffling Takaya's hair. The waters swept up the shore in waves reaching Naoe's feet. Then, Takaya raised his face, and calmly looked at Naoe.

"Did you... like... Kagetora?"

There was the cold silence once again.
But Naoe's expression never changed. The man only returned Takaya's stare with an icy introspection. Takaya tolerated his glare, without averting his eyes.

"You should know."

"..."

"How I can't stop thinking about you. How you continue to threaten me, how I hate and envy you. You already know of all my feelings for you, before I violated Minako."

Takaya gulped. Hearing the name Minako inspired fear within him. That was the name he had called out countless of times in his dreams. But Takaya had yet to understand what it meant.

"Who is Minako?"

"..."

"Your past.. what exactly..."

"You know everything, don't you? Things have turned out this way because of you. It doesn't matter if I raped Minako, snatched her from your side or anything else, all of this is a cunning trap that you arranged."

Even though Takaya regarded Naoe's extreme words with terror, he still drummed up the courage to drive away his fear.
"Just what exactly do you want Takaya to do for you? Even if Kagetora is really as you described, Takaya can't do anything about it."

"It's not that you can't do anything."

Naoe stared sharply at Takaya.

"I won't let you say that you can't do anything about it. No matter who you are, my heart won't change. Whether it is Uesugi Kagetora or Ougi Takaya or any other body... The existence of your soul dominates my everything. Threatening me, injuring me. You should be well-aware of your grave sins; to stop looking for an escape route would be the right thing to do."

"You... I just don't understand... Why would Kagetora continuously threaten you? You are not his enemy. Shouldn't he be your closest comrade compared to anyone else? Aren't you his faithful vassal? Aren't you his outstanding subordinate?"

"I am a faithful vassal. A retainer who obeys you. But before all of that..."

"..."

"I am a man -- a human being."

Takaya stiffened slightly. Naoe continued with his cold, penetrating words.

"Because I am a man, I can't endure being restrained and controlled by you. Wanting myself to be more outstanding than this person; hoping to conquer him one day, obtaining victory; I can't help but think in this manner. I am a man who can't abandon this sort of ignorance, this wild hope."

"..."

"Although I'm your best comrade, at the same time I'm your most severe critic. The perfect being that you are, the person who embodies the ideals of others... The full extent of my flaws are always exposed before you. Your existence threatens me. But even so, I still yearn for that one day where I will be victorious."

"Naoe..."

"I... like you."
Naoe had no expression on his face, uttering the words without the slightest hint of feeling.
"I love you."

"So..."
Takaya did not know to reply Naoe's mechanical words.
"So what exactly do you expect me to do?"

"You don't have to do anything."

"Saying these words..."
Takaya could not understand why Naoe used such a perfunctory expression to declare his love. All the words that left Naoe's lips, besides sounding feigned, were devoid of any other feelings. Was he sincere? Or was there some concealed meaning? Takaya could not grasp the truth behind all of this.
"What do you take me for?"

Shaken by Naoe's words and deeds, Takaya began to feel miserable. Due to his excessive resentment, tears began to well up in Takaya's eyes.

"You think that I can't do anything..."

"..."

"Right from the very beginning, you believed that I could never cure you of your suffering. Believed that I can't do anything for you...!"

"Then..."

Naoe quietly spoke.
"Can you let me hold you?"

"...!"

"Can you accept me like a woman?"

"You-- "

"All you can do, is be a prop for the temporary relief of my pain. Will you strip naked and let me press down on you, accept me and sway your body in pleasure?"

Takaya shuddered, his eyes widening as he stared, feeling something cold trickle down his back, his body stiffened tightly.
"You... want me to...."

"..."

Naoe gazed at Takaya's pale face without any expression.
"You obviously can't do it..."
Naoe said, closing his eyes.

"You can't even be a prop to let me forget my pain. Saying things like wanting to save me... Please stop with this sort of casual, irresponsible talk. Your unceasing arrogance and sense of superiority are your shortcomings."

"It's not that..."

"I don't expect anything from you. It's not possible for you to give up your life for my sake. Saying things like sacrificing yourself for me, worrying about my work and devotion... At the end of the day, you still feel yourself to be self-important."

Takaya shook his head continuously. He could not find the words to reply, he could only resist through persisting with his silent denial.

"It's no use denying. If that is the case, can you... do it?"

"..."

"You obviously can't..."

Takaya could only tremble unceasingly. Wanting to say something against these irrefutable words that pierced through him. Wanting to retaliate against the cold words uttered by the man that spoke of having no expectations of him.
But no matter what he wanted to say, it would not reach this man. More than half of all the faults he pointed out were facts. To offer his body to another man with such frightening issues, this was not a possible transaction. Even if the other was someone he placed great trust in, no, it was because he trusted him that Takaya could not do this. He was only afraid. Takaya was afraid of the other unexpectedly looking at him with lust if he were to put his absolute trust in him.

But Naoe understood Takaya's feelings completely. He knew from the start that Takaya would reject this. It was extremely painful to hear him say that he absolutely could not do anything. He had wanted to protect himself from the pain. Takaya could not do anything. He felt disappointed for saying those words, as the other looked at him without expression and without hope, hindering reconciliation in this way. He only felt inexhaustible anger, remorse...
"Why are you crying?"

Naoe asked softly. Naoe's question made Takaya realize that tears were streaming down his face.
"Are you pitying me?"

"...no..."

"Then are you feeling pity for yourself?"

Takaya's body quivered as he nervously bit his lower lip. He looked as if he wanted to bore a hole through the other's line of sight, looking disparagingly at Naoe, suppressing the sound of his mumblings.

"The person you want to embrace, is not me."

"Takaya-san..."

"You want to hold Kagetora!"
Takaya shouted, spitting out the words, and headed towards the dock.
He did not look back.
Naoe quietly observed his back.
Takaya, frigid from the cold climate, wrapped his arms around his shoulders, and left.
He did not look back again.



Original fiction © Kuwabara Mizuna.

Friday, April 6, 2007

The missing conversation from Episode 12

Naoe's indecisiveness was really missing from the anime during the Mirror arc. In the anime, the character was portrayed to be pretty much single-minded in his determination to protect and be with Kagetora. There was none of the mental conflicts that went on in his head.

He wants to be free of his insufferable love for his master and yet panicked when Kagetora's soul was trapped in the mirror, in danger of being taken away from him forever; flew into temper (re: "I want to kill you!" stated at least five times by Naoe) when Ujiteru told him he couldn't bring Saburo back without the other mirror; and became highly distressed when the body still appeared lifeless after Kagetora's soul was released, begging Takaya to return.

Despite all of that he seems to be making poor use of his 'second chance' with Kagetora. The sad thing is, I can understand his reasons. Takaya, at this point, is trying so desperately to understand Naoe's feelings, to help him with his pain even though he doesn't remember a thing about the past. If Naoe were to simply let Takaya know that all he wants is Kagetora's acceptance and acknowledgement of his love for him, Takaya would be more than happy to reciprocate.

But no. After the scene in the boat, when Takaya very earnestly tells Naoe that he wants to help him overcome his pain and suffering, asking him what exactly is it that Naoe expects from him, Naoe shoots him down with a request that both of them know can't be fulfilled. And it's not so much that he truly wants Takaya to cheapen himself and become Naoe's tart as to want to triumph over Kagetora. He basically puts Takaya at a loss for words, substantiating that he is useless and unable to do anything but cause Naoe suffering. Takaya is essentially Kagetora without his 'weapons' and Naoe, completely aware of this, takes full advantage almost as if to compensate for the four hundred years of continuously losing to Kagetora's brilliance.

And Takaya, who is so lost in this chaos, is probably in greater shock and confusion than before. As much as I'm beginning to tire of his "I'm not Kagetora!" rants, I do feel like part of his denial has to do with the fact that he can't give Naoe what he wants. He can't help Naoe because he isn't 'Kagetora'.

Thursday, April 5, 2007

Book 06 Chapter 09 鏡の中の獣 Naoe-Haruie excerpt

From chinese translations done by Hinako.

Draft: Version 2 - final
Notes:
PS: do not distribute this without my permission


"Takaya is missing?"
Naoe, using the public phone in the main hall of the hotel, shouted into the receiver.
"How did this happen? Haruie. What happened to him!"
This happened the other night. Since then, Naoe continued to stay in the Maiko family's hotel beside Lake Chuzenjiko.
On the other side of the receiver, Ayako replied in embarrassment. Ayako was currently at her residence in Yokohama. Naoe was about to ask Ayako to do a search on the Tsutsuga mirror, but instead was informed by Ayako of the incident at Nerima city the day before and of Takaya having not returned to Matsumoto after going off by himself. Naoe was in complete consternation, his tone of voice growing harsh as he spoke, "Why did you let him go alone?" , "Leaving him to return by himself is outrageous!" and so on. Naoe's fury and severe assignment of blame to Ayako caused her to become upset.

"It's no use getting angry! If you want to accuse somebody then you're the one to blame! It's your fault. Why didn't you accompany him back? Isn't it your duty to be at Kagetora's side?"

Naoe widened his eyes in shock.

"Even though you have no idea what happened, you can't not be by Kagetora's side! You can't leave him! Why did you go to Nikko? Leaving Kagetora like this without any concern whatsoever, just what are you trying to do! I really can't take this anymore!"

"..."

Naoe silently wrinkled his brow. Ayako could no longer bear with Naoe's way of evading his own problems and putting the blame on other people. It was also because she could sympathize with and was more worried for Naoe than Chiaki was. Even if others found Naoe's anguish to be overwrought, Ayako understood Naoe's feelings, therefore always exercised caution in her choice of words.
But now she could no longer restrain herself. Ayako honestly felt that Naoe relied too much on wild hope and was being self-centred, and thus could not help but be stern with her words.

"You still have Kagetora around! You ramble on endlessly about a whole bunch of matters, but the most important person to you isn't by your side! You are really slow-witted when all is said and done! No matter what happens, at the end of the day, isn't he still here!"

"Haruie..."

"What is it exactly that's holding you back! Don't you love Kagetora! More than anyone else! All this talk of not being able to reach a resolve are just lies! You really shouldn't leave him again! You should be with him, every minute, every second!"
Ayako was expressing her innermost feelings, her voice eventually breaking into a whimper.

"Why are you crying, Haruie?"

"I, I don't know! Because you're too dense, which I find detestable! As for me, I've waited two hundred years and still haven't seen him... Even if I do meet him, I can't be sure if that person is really him! You're really careless! Downright careless!"

"..."

Ayako was referring to her lover from two hundred years ago. Hearing Ayako cry on the other end of the phoneline, Naoe felt perplexed.

"...I understand. Don't cry..."

"You don't understand! A person like you would never understand! You still have him! Isn't that enough to be happy! You don't understand at all!"

Ayako was hysterical over the current situation. It was almost like a quarrel between lovers, Naoe thought, laughing softly.

"Don't cry anymore... you'll make me worry."

"If you really feel that way then start looking for Kagetora immediately. Kagetora is waiting for you, go to him quickly. During that time, it was certain that... In spite of the Minako incident, he still needs you."

The smile immediately disappeared from Naoe's face. His expression appearing slightly dismal as he lowered his head.
"If... that is the case, that would be good."

"Don't ever leave his side. Don't leave him again. This is for your own sake."

For my own...?

Naoe's lips mumbled in self-ridicule. The pain he suffered from not being able to leave him. Unable to part from the sovereign... his one and only dictator, to leave him would mean misery.

Isn't it the end?

He mumbled repeatedly in self-confirmation.
It was time for the four hundred years of this journey to come to a close... This military campaign was meant to end conflicts. There will not be another war to come. This was a fight to end all wars.
He had already decided that he will die once Yami Sengoku is over. And that will be the day he bids farewell to Kagetora, the closure to his life as 'Naoe Nobutsuna'. He would be free from the pain of loving this one person. Perpetually unable to escape from his side, there was no other alternative except to abandon his life.

To say goodbye to everything...

Let this Yami Sengoku end... Until this objective was achieved, he had allowed himself to live. Even though he had long endured this suffering, it did not matter any more. His past would be extinguished. Regardless of his desires, the Minako incident, the sins he has committed, everything will be obliterated...
Away from the unwitting dictator -

As long as he was not by his side, he would be liberated...



Original fiction © Kuwabara Mizuna

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Cobalt-ヨリドラ 2005 Track 6

From Chinese translation by HISANAGI.

Draft: Version 1 - final
Notes: based on Vol 34; 織田信長 Oda Nobunaga; 布都御魂 Futsu-mitama (some legendary sword); 魔王之種 (Nobunaga's 'Seed of Evil Kings'); seiiki (sacred precinct)
PS: do not distribute without my permission

Takaya: Come here... come here, Naoe!

Naoe: I calmly kneel in front of you. Your body is shivering. Your hands remove the cap of my uniform, during which you see the red lustre of a stone, buried on my forehead. That is right, that is the 'Seed of Evil Kings'.

Takaya: Ah.. ah... arggh... Why did you do this ....?! Why... Why did you allow this sort of stupid thing! Why did you come here! Why... Why! I want to kill you! I want to kill you, Oda Nobunaga! I'll dismember your body with my own hands! Tear you to shreds! Nobunaga!!
Why, Naoe! In order to rescue me, you betrayed yourself, exchanging your soul for the Futsu-mitama...! Doing this sort of thing! Did you feel that I would want this! Did you think that I would permit this! Did you think that surrendering to Nobunaga would save me! What kind of joke is this! If I were to be saved by that man, I would rather happily await the destruction of my own soul!
Do you know what this means?! You'll become a slave to Nobunaga. It's no different than being robbed of your own free will. You'll lose your freedom! You won't be your own person anymore!!
Look into your soul, ignore the control of Nobunaga...
Your soul should belong to you. You must have your own freedom! Your own free will, your choice to pledge your life and loyalty to one person, this person should always be me alone!!! You would go so far as to sell your soul to Nobunaga...!!
You are mine! You are MINE!! NAOE!!!

***

Naoe: I... am not joking, I won't... be... overwhelmed by...

Takaya: Is this... a gamble?

Naoe: I won't lose...

Takaya: Is this... your last gamble?!

Naoe: ...Please... forgive me. Please... forgive me.
What I long for... cannot be violated.

Takaya: Are you sealing yourself? You have conveyed your conviction. To pledge absolute obedience to Nobunaga's commands, complete devotion and loyalty.
We will no longer be master and subordinate, but strangers.


Naoe: But, no matter how much my spirit is trampled on, this nameless desire will still survive. No one will ever be able to crush it. This is deeper than any conviction or faith, my existence will continue until the very last seiiki.
That is absolute!
Even if this seiiki suffers a violation.


Takaya: The truth and our existence -
I understand. I... completely understand. You... you... If that is the case, then go!

Original fiction © Kuwabara Mizuna.

Books 6-8 kanji references

Persons

高阪昌信: Kosaka Masanobu (弹正 Danjo stands for a formal title, Danjōchū 弾正忠)
明智光秀: Akechi Mitsuhide
织田信長: Oda Nobunaga
松永久秀: Matsunaga Hisahide
荒木村茂: Araki Murashige
北条氏泰: Hojo Ujiyasu
北条氏政: Hojo Ujimasa
武田由比子: Takeda Yuiko
森野沙织: Morino Saori
伊都: Itsu
浅岡麻衣子: Asaoka Maiko
遠山: Touyama
上杉谦信: Uesugi Kenshin

Regions

比叡山: (Hieizan) Mt. Hiei [Kyoto]

畿内: Kinai - territories in the vicinity of the capital and under direct imperial rule; (in Japanese history) the five kuni in the immediate vicinity of Kyoto

関東/关东: Kanto - a geographical area of Honshū, the largest island in Japan

富山: Toyama - prefecture in the Hokuriku area

Places
日光东照宫: Nikko Toshogu - Shinto shrine dedicated to Tokugawa Ieyasu, the founder of the Tokugawa line of shoguns in Japan
中禅寺: Chuzenjiko - name of a lake in Nikko National Park
南口: minamiguchi - south entrance
芦湖: Lake Ashi - the lake with Mount Fuji in the background is the symbol of Hakone
箱根神社: Hakone shrine (jinja)
小田原: Odawara
越後: Echigo

Objects

恙镜: Tsutsuga mirror

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